TheNoobhut

I always wanted to be a father, I always wanted to be in the army, I always wanted to have a family of my own. Grade 9 I found the love of my life, at age 22 I married her. We both worked to get the money we wanted for our dream house. I worked as an armoured soldier, she worked as a pharmacist. She wanted a fancy kitchen and I a video game room, but what we both wanted was a child, a son to call our own. We wanted him to grow up to be smart, brave, strong. After 3 years of marriage we got our wish, he was born and I was a father. Now we had everything. A nice big house with a big backyard so me and my boy can play sports, a big fancy kitchen so my wife can cook anything, a video game room with every game known to man. But our favourite room was his room, our boy’s room. When he was first born it was full of stuffed animals with rainbows and stars painted everywhere, when he turned 5 we painted his room with his favourite Pokémon, Charmander, just like his father. At age 10 we filled his room with his first T.V and computer, but made sure to limit his use on it.

     Now his room is white, he has a normal bed with 3 blankets and 3 pillows, posters of his 2 favourite anime; Dragon Ball Z and One Piece on his wall, He has 1 dresser with his T.V and x Box on it. Cloths all over the floor. The only thing missing is him… The only thing I’m missing is him…. I have seen men die from almost everything, I’ve held there hands as they said their last words to me, I’ve saved many lives, and ended many lives. It’s what you have to do in war.. But after all I’ve been through, all I’ve done. I was not ready… Not ready to be standing in front of his grave, not ready to say goodbye. I didn’t want to accept it, but now I realise… He’s gone. I wish I was there to save him, I don’t care if I died in the process I wish he would of lived. He was 15, second year of high school, He had a girlfriend his mother and I loved and accepted as one of us. He had lots of friends that acted just like him, he had good grades, grades that were WAY better then my own. He wanted to be in the army just like me…But…

     Kids now a day…. They don’t understand… They don’t know the dangers of drugs and weapons. They don’t listen to their parents, the music motivates them, and fashion makes them dress in ways we would never dress back in the day. My son wasn’t like that, he dressed right, he didn’t do drugs, he kept to himself… But one day.. I told him before I left for work. “Son.. I have a surprise for you. “ of course he new what I meant, every time I said `I have a surprise for you` it means we are going to go play sports, or video games, or something just the 2 of us. I was planning on taking him to the shooting range; teach him to fire a gun. I planned to get off work early and pick him up. At work everything was normal, all I did was talk to some friends and fill out paper work for the shooting range. Once the clock hit 2:00pm I left to go pick him up.

     He wasn’t at school; his friends said they haven’t seen him all day, I was worried, and he would never skip school. I got in my car and started looking for him. I called Reliva my wife to tell her he is missing and to call the cops. I was panicking,  its what any good father would do, I looked in every spot he would ever go to but he was not in any of them, I drove into downtown when I heard two gun shots go off. My heart skipped a beat, I pulled a pistol out of my bag, it was the pistol I was going to let him use. I got out of my car and ran down the closes ally where I heard the shot and there he was. On the ground holding his gut, I look up and see a man run off, I was able to get a good look at him. Tall, white, brown hair and wearing a black sweater that had a skull on it, I went to go shoot him but stopped to save my son. If only I was able to find him before he was shot.

     I still don’t understand who would want to kill my son but as I sat there beside him screaming for help, trying to stop the bleeding I realized he was smiling. “Don’t worry dad.” He said. “I’ll be fine.”
I felt tears form in my eyes and I kept telling him he would make it. I spent a good 20 minutes trying to stop the bleeding till I realized he was going to die. “What is the surprise dad?” he asked me. My hands were covered in his blood, I grabbed his hand and looked him in the eyes, I didn’t want my son to die, but I couldn’t save him, no one was coming to help, “We are going to the shooting range son, but I might be a little late.” I told him. I couldn’t hold back the tears, I closed my sons eyes my shirt was now stained with his blood, I held him into my chest crying for what felt like ages before paramedics came and took him away, My wife came and put me in the car, we followed the paramedics to the hospital.

     And now it has been 2 weeks. I’m still shaken up; I still can’t believe he’s gone.
“Come on Relx, let’s go for a walk.” Reliva and I put on our coats and walked out the front door, it was raining, the rain felt as heavy as my tears were that day. She held my arm as we walked to his grave, made sure to buy some flowers. “Ron Relic 2023-2038” I drop to my knees and start crying, Reliva bends down and kisses me on the forehead. “Ron we are back, just wanted to say hi. I hope you’re doing well, we miss you.” The words barley left her mouth. Not many people understand our pain, not many people have lost their child. We stayed there for a bit, after we didn’t know what to do. At this time I would take Ron to the Park and play some baseball, or take the family out to dinner or a movie. But... It’s just not the same…

     I’m not the same… Even though it’s been 2 weeks I can tell I’ve changed, I haven’t been eating as much as I use to, I’m shorter now and have no energy. We ended up just walking home, didn’t even bother turning off the lights. Reliva walked up to bed and I walked into Ron’s room. I sat on his gamming chair and turned on his computer. He left his face book open, over 500 notifications 134 friend requests, 700 messages. There is now a face book group of him. “ R.I.P RON RELIC” people would post heart warming comments about him every few seconds, he was truly loved. I opened the chat box to his girlfriend and read her messages. “Ron! Please tell me it’s a joke.” “Ron…no please just no I love you!” “I can’t believe it, your gone..” I start crying again.

     I messaged her saying the funeral was in 2 days. As well as updated his status inviting everyone who cared about him. I don’t know what to do anymore, I don’t know what to say, where to go.

     “Relx wake up, the doors for you.” I open my eyes to find my self laying on Ron’s bed. I slowly get up. “What’s going on?” A tall man walks into the room, he was wearing a officer uniform. I stand up and salute him, trying to hold back the tears I wanted to shed. “Relx. I know you just lost a son, and you must be going through a lot, but you have been called to action, you leave tonight at 6:00 for Japan, your squad will be protecting the citizens there as the rest fight off the Americans and Russians.” This was perfect, first I lose my son, and then I break down, now I’m going to war. Reliva walks over and hug’s me tight. “I will see you soon.” The officer walks out the front door closing it behind him, and we are left there, not knowing what to do.

     “No…No…I can’t lose you...”
“Reliva...”
“No!” She breaks into tears; I comfort her in my arms holding back my tears, trying to think of the right thing to say. She looked at me with tears running down her face. “Don’t die. I lost Ron I can’t lose you!”
“I promise I will come back alive... I love you...”
“I love you too.”

    What is true sorrow? Losing your favourite toy? Getting dumped? Failing a math test? No… True Sorrow is losing something you can’t replace; you can always buy a new toy or find a new girl who you like, study and pass the next math test. But you can’t just have another son. He won’t be the same, and the shock of losing a son stays with you forever. I know true sorrow. I still feel his blood on my hands… I just wish it was me….Instead of him….